If you don't like how things are, change it! You're not a tree - Jim Rohn

Sunday 17 April 2011

The Power of Thoughts and Words

It amazes me how negative we, as a society, are to, not only the people around us, but the world in general.

Working in a supermarket (hopefully not for much longer), I'm regularly bombarded with the negativity society breeds. Everything from the headlines on the glossy magazines touting break ups and cheating, to how to lose weight, and feel good about yourself; parents talking down to, or at their children instead of just to them; to the bitching that occurs between collegues about other collegues (which is normal to some extent) or just general bitching.

Even in the news it's always one person blaming another for something. Particularly politics. One party says something about the other, the second one retaliates. Some days it's like watching a tennis match, heads twisting back and forth as insults are slung from one side of the fence to the other.

Looking at all this, is it really any wonder that young people in particular are so depressed. One week you are told something is good, the next it's bad for you. One week your favourite celebrity is too skinny, the next they've put on weight and are starting a diet.

There's no middle ground. It seems that we, as a society, aren't happy unless we are tearing someone down. There must be something to pick at. Is it any wonder people have low self esteem, eating disorders, exercise disorders etc? No-one seems to be happy to be 'just average' anymore. What's wrong with being the average size? Or not having an opinion one way or the other on a topic you're not interested in? (The only occassion this bothers me is when I have a conversation with someone who seems to have no opinon in anything!)

Thanks to having stumbled upon these wonderful blogs I am really taking a good look at myself, and what I say and think. Not only do we need to be careful of what we say and how we say it to other people, (I am regularly told to lose the lecturing tone of voice I seem to naturally adopt when I'm talking about something I'm passionate about. I'm working on it), it's just as important to take a look at what we say, and even more importantly (in my opinion), those thoughts that don't get spoken aloud, about ourselves.

Think about this for a minute...

How many thoughts a day do you have about yourself that are negative in nature? 3 or 4? Maybe 10 or 11? I'm not just talking big thoughts that are easy to catch like "I'm fat and ugly. Nothing's going to look good on me!" (I have had this internal thought in many a dressing room with unflattering lights and mirrors). How about simple things like "I can't", Or "It wont work"? How many times have you internalised a conversation about yourself/other people after someone's said something nasty to you or criticised you?

It's these thoughts, things that seem small and inconsequential that do the most damage. Simple remarks you make to yourself about you and those around you that can affect you more than you think.

How many times have you had something 'bad' happen in the morning and it ruins the rest of the day for you? Maybe you spilt your coffee over your morning newspaper. Maybe you slept in and are late for work. Maybe you got stuck in traffic. Do you think in these situations "the rest of the day is going to be just as bad now"? And when you think something like this, does this actually occur?

I know it does for me. Days I wake up and something goes wrong, if I think "the day's just going to be like this now isn't it?" the rest of the day follows the morning's patterns. If I can laugh it off, find something good out of it (even if it's just the excuse to sing along with the music in my car when I'm stuck in traffic), I find that the rest of the day isn't as bad as it could have been.

It's similar to going into new situations and expecting disaster and then getting it.

The way you think, tends to be thrown back at you in actions. If you are sad/unhappy/angry etc, the world will work with that mood and keep you there. If you're happy, same thing.

Of course, bad things happen to people who are eternally optimistic. Good things happen to perpetually angry/sad people.

The difference..?

The way they look at the world. If you are optimistic/happy etc, and you get hit with a hurdle of some sort, you don't look at it like it's the end of the world. You don't let it ruin your day/month/year. You don't dwell on it. You tackle the problem, and move on with your day/week/month etc.

Example:

A few years ago my Grandmother (who is now 70) had a hip replacement. She is one of the mentally strongest, stubborn, people I know. The week before she had her hip done, another lady had her's done. She was telling my Grandmother about all the things she struggled to do, and how hard a time she was having of it.

Now, my Grandmother lives alone. She has done for many, many years (with the exception of her Grandkids coming to visit, and sometimes stay). She knew she couldn't afford to lay around feeling sorry for herself for weeks on end, while she waited to fully heal.

She only ever used a walking stick type thing. No crutches or anything of the type for her. When she found she couldn't bend over to pick things up off the ground, she bought herself a grabby thing that could do it for her. She found ways to do her washing and get it from the washing machine to the clothes line in her backyard, hang it out, and get it in again. She found ways to do anything she had to do.

She was told she was not to drive for 6 weeks after her surgery. 4 weeks after the op, she drove herself to my aunt's place so my aunt could drive her to the doctors for her check up. Just so her doctor didn't know she was driving so soon after the op.

After 4 weeks she was walking about 5km (3 miles) everyday or there abouts. She wasn't actually supposed to, but she felt well enough to do it, and she did it at a pace that suited her. She didn't push herself, but she didn't lay about feeling sorry for herself either.

The other woman? The one who lamented about how hard it was? Was still finding it hard to walk after 4 weeks.

Then, last year, she was diagnosed with Gall stones, and she had to have her gall bladder removed. She woke up in incredible pain in October. She was told not to eat fatty things, it would just irritate the stones, and put her back in a world of pain. She got her gall bladder removed in March.

In 5 months she rarely ate anything with fat in it. She was very sensible in what she ate. Not thinking about it. No but I really like ice cream/chocolate etc for her. No I'll have it once a week. Just I can't eat it now so I wont. She said that she would rather have 3 children naturally, one after the other, than go through that again. She also lost 11kg (or there abouts) as a bonus. She can now wear her engagement and eternity rings again.

My point..?

If you put your mind to it, you can do or be anything. It all comes back to your thoughts, and thought patterns. If you put out negative energy into the world, you'll get negative energy back. If you're a happy, bright person, you'll get good things come to you. I'm nat saying that good, happy, vibrant people don't have negative things happen in their lives, we all have things we have to face and overcome, but they deal with them in a way that is totally different to those who are negative. If you're someone who has no direction, no idea of where they want to go and what they want to do, you tend to flounder and just keep doing the same thing over and over again.

After reading through those wonderful blogs I mentioned earlier, I'm vowing to take action on my thinking.

I vow to be careful with what I think/say. I vow to stop any negative thoughts in their tracks, and any I miss I vow to amend with something positive.

Look at this post of inspiring words. They might just help get you started on your journey to bringing more positivity into your life.

What mantras do you live by?

Friday 8 April 2011

Sickness..?

Not the post I was planning on posting today. While I was in the shower I had this whole blog planned on the Biggest Loser. But, the best laid plans. I'll discuss in another post.

Right now, my little sister (I say little but she's 21), is home from uni for the holidays, and 3 weeks of prac teaching. It'll be amazing if we don't kill each other. We get on, don't think we don't, but at the same time we fight like cats and dogs alot of the time too. One wrong word can set H off into a bad mood and a bad temper. To make this worse, this year seems to be her beligerent and hostile phase, (something I don't think I went through to the extent she is), and seems to have hit her rebelious phase a little late. She's in her 4th year of uni but this year seems to be the year she's lost her head. Partying 4-5 times a week, not knowing what time she's getting home, the girls she lives with being on an alcohol ban and her flat being inspected everyday because another of her flatmates complained about it not being cleaned (she lives on campus), laying in the middle of the road, drunk, at 4am! It's not like her. Now I know everyone is entitled to party and have a good time, but mum and dad are paying for her to be at uni, so they're not impressed.

Anyway... the reason for this entry as opposed to me professing my love for all things Biggest Loser...

She's sick. Right now I can hear her, down the hall, coughing like she's trying to expel her lungs. This happens. Everyone gets sick. But lately, I've been running into more and more people who are sick all the time. H is sick at least 3-4 times a year (although she does get hayfever so that has something to do with it in the warmer months.) Another girl I work with has been sick about 5 times this year and it's only the 4th month of the year. Everything from whooping cough to a cold. You name it, she's probably had it.

This lead to a discussion on sickness the last time I worked with her (what else do you have to talk about at 5am?) She was talking about how it was only her 4th Friday shift with the department because she'd been sick so many other times. Which led me to say (stupidly in hindsight) that I don't get sick.

Ever!

But it's true. I don't. The last time I was really sick was in 2005. My first year of uni. My boyfried at the time, J, and I were home for the Easter holidays. We went to a party for a school friend of mine's birthday. I felt fine when we got there. By the end of the night I was sick. Physically. I thought maybe I had food poisoning, and settled in for a night of cramping and generally feeling horrible (I've never actually had food poisoning so I have no idea what it's like). It wasn't feed poisoning. By the next morning I was still being physically sick but there were also... other... things. Anyway. It took me about 3-4 days to get over it. 3-4 days of me not being able to eat anything besides ice blocks and vegemite on toast (the best thing for an upset stomach). 3-4 days of reading Stephen King's The Dark Tower series, and sleeping. Then J caught it and cried like a baby until we took him to the on call doctor to get him a shot to make him stop throwing up. Sook.

Anyway...

Before that I think I was about 7 and was sent home from a Brownie camp in Sydney because of how sick I was. Mum and dad had to come and get me and I didn't want to go home. I wanted to stick it out. But in the end the adults won out (I managed 2 days before I gave in and let them call my parents). It wa a good thing they did. All I did was lay on the couch in a pile of blankets and watch cartoons, my trusty toast and vegemite, and ice blocks close at hand. Then the other girls caught it. Oops.

Point is... I don't get sick. Sure I get the occassional cold, but other than that I don't get sick. Even with a cold it's some vitamin c, garlic and horseradish tablets, and I keep going.

But all this running into sick people has made think. Why do some people get sick more than others? What is it about some people that make them susceptible to illness than others? (I should probably point out that I'm not allergic to anything either. H calls me an anomaly because she's allergic to bees and a penicilin equivalent. I've also never had the chicken pox even though it went through my extended family I was close to at the time, my primary school, and then 3 times through the college I was living at while at uni.)

I have always thought (and science seems to be catching on) that all this germ killing we do is actually harming us. If children are kept in a bubble, away from anything that might make then sick, how is there immune system supposed to know what it's supposed to fight and what is harmless? It's one of the reasons I think allergies are on the rise too. It's why these antibiotic superbugs are in existance. It's why, I think, so many people (young people in particular) are getting sick.

Now, I'm not saying don't vaccinate. I actually think that you are stupid if you don't vaccinate your kids. If you can protect them from something like the chicken pox from killing them, why wouldn't you. But it's things like wiping everything down with an antibacterial wipe that I can't understand. We didn't and we survived.

I remember, growing up, doing things like playing in the dirt and the mud. Playing touch (and sometimes tackle) football with my cousins and friends. Swimming in rivers and dams and lakes as well as the pool. Playing with the dogs, then running my hands under water and saying they were clean then going to have something to eat. Climbing (and falling out of) trees, and riding my bike. Learning to rollerskate (and later ice skate).

As kids, on the weekends and holidays, we had breakfast and were then sent out to play. We would come back to someone's house and have lunch. Then go play and then go home for dinner. And it was fun. Getting dirty and having fun was what being a kid was all about. It wasn't about computer games or the TV. Sure, H and I had an Atari when we were little, then later, a computer. But we never played it. Only on occassions we couldn't go outside. And even then, only sparingly. We would draw, colour, read books, watch movies on days were were stuck outside. We never wanted the latest PlayStation, or XBox. We had friends who had them, and we would use theirs, then come home. Even now, the only gaming console we own, as a family, is a Wii. And I still can't use it (unless it's the WiiFit or something similar) for too long without getting bored. It's the way we were raised.

Back to the sickness...

I believe, in my non scientific taught brain, that this is the reason kids are getting sick more often, and with superbugs. Is it any surprise that superbugs thrive in streile environmnents. It's why staph was only found in hospitals. Bugs, viruses etc, just like us, adapt to their surroundings. If you keep throwing antibiotics at a bug, it's going ot get stronger and more resistent to the drugs we use to beat it.

It is, I think, common sense.

I believe we need to go back to not worrying too much about germs and bugs. Obviously take care of things like cuts and other wounds. Cover then during the day, let them air out at night. Cover your mouth when you sneeze or cough. If you've got something contagous, or a cold etc, stay at home for a few days and get better. Have a shower everyday and clean yourself, wash your clothes, clean your house. But don't wipe up every spill with antibacterial wipes. Don't worry too much about using anything other than soap and water. It's actually the best cleaning method there is.

If you let yourself, and your kids, be exposed to these sorts of, relatively harmess, germs, they will acutally get sick less. If you stop pouring medication down their, and your, throats everytime you get the sniffles, you and they, will be sick less often. Your immune system needs something to fight against to get stronger. It's the use it or lose it scenario. If you don't use your immune system, when something big comes along, it won't know what to do.

A lot of this comes down to exercise and nutrition too. If you look at healthy people, people who don't get sick, they tend to exercise and eat well. Now you don't have to be perfect, but even just 5 serves of veggies, 2 serves of fruit every day will go a long way to helping you feel better, even if you don't get sick. Some exercise, even walking for 30 minutes a day, will get your heart pumping and lift your mood. It will make you feel better.

And this eating better and exercising (especially outdoors) will expose you to new things, prompting your body to assess it and decide if it's harmless or harmful. It will make your immune system work and do the job it's supposed to do.

So my view on this*:
  • Don't worry about germs so much. Keep things clean, but not evey spill has to be wiped over with an antibacterial. Leave these for the medicine cabinet.
  • Don't get medication unless you really need it. There's nothing you can do for a common cold, just rest and take care of yourself. Doping yourself up on anything other than asprin is just wasting your money.
  • Eat well. Make sure you get a variety of fresh foods in your diet everyday.
  • Exercise. Outdoors if you can but a gym is just as good. Even just 30 minutes a day. Get your heart pumping and your blood moving.
*Please remember that I am not a medical professional. These are just my theories.

I hope this has led you to think about your own life and what you do, or don't do within it. It did for me.

D xo

Tuesday 5 April 2011

Oh Gym... How I Have Missed You...

But tonight there were just too many people for my liking.

I will admit, I am somewhat selfish when it comes to my space at the gym. I like to have a treadmill/cross trainer/bike etc spare between me and the next person. I like to be able to use, if not the weights I want to, then another weights machine I want. I like to have room when I stretch, and not feel cramped in like sardines. And I like that I can do it with people not watching/glaring when I walk up next to them.

I get in a kind of zone when I'm exercising on my own. I can't do it in a gym class etc, but when I'm on my own, be it at the gym, on a run, outside, whatever, I just turn my music on and let my mind wander. Most of the time I don't even know what I've been thinking about when I finish. When I warm up I go through what I want to work on. When I cool down/stretch, I think of what I have left to do that day or something similar. In between... I have no idea. But I always feel lighter when I finish. Maybe my brain works through some problems or something without me noticing, but I always feel like something has been lifted off me.

I can't get into this space when I have people within close proximity to me, particularly in a gym setting. Their pace on the treadmills plays with mine, I have to hope that the machine I want next will be available and if not, what else can I use. I have to hope that noone is going to take that last space to stretch when I'm on my last set etc.

But more than that...

I notice when people aren't doing exercises properly. And I just want to walk over to them and correct them. But they're usually people who give off a 'stay away from me' vibe. So I just do nothing. It's probably a bad thing for a trainer, but I'm not employed by the gym I use so...

Take a couple tonight. While I was stretching they were doing ab work. They started doing scissor legs, then onto the plank. Neither of them were doing either of the exercises right, (I will explain both of these in a later post), but it was the plank that annoyed me most. The woman was the worst of her and the guy she was with. She had her butt so far in the air she almost made a V, not a plank. He was straighter than her, but still not great.

I think they possibly caught me looking coz they both kept throwing dirty glances in my direction. So I just left them to it. If they want to do something that really isn't going to help them, and intimidate people who want to help them, they can.

This, this is the reason I go of a morning or during the day. Less people. But I hadn't been today, so I went tonight after dinner. I have complained about this before, and I should have been more organised, but I was waiting on a phone call back about my flights from LA to Sydney, so I wanted to wait around for that. It never came. I will be calling again tomorrow.

Trainer's Tip: Exercise when YOU FEEL is the best time! There's so much information out there about when's the best time to train. Some say early of a morning before you eat. Other's say early of a morning but eat just something small. Other's say during the afternoon because your muscles are at their warmest, therefore at their most flexible, making you less prone to injury.

All these ideas have merit. And they all work. But if they don't work for you, what's the point? You might naturally be a morning person, so working out at night might be impossible for you. You might have children, so the night might be better for you because you have someone to look after them for an hour or so. Maybe you have kids at school, so you can exercise sometime during the day.

Point is, if you don't fit in exercise when it fits WITH YOU, you won't do it. End of story.

So tonight... was actually quite a light night. A 5 minute warm up on the treadmill before hitting some reasonably light weights for my arms, chest and back. Some body weight single leg squats. 5 minutes of intervals on the rower. Then 5 minutes of abs work then about 15 minutes of stretching. All in all about 60 minutes.

It wasn't my best workout, and it definitely wasn't my hardest workout. But it was a workout.

Only got in 1 outdoor workout last week. Work was insane so my exercise suffered. I didn't make it to the gym at all, but I did get in a circut workout at home. Not nearly enough, but better than nothing.

Off to bed now. Sleep is important too.