Blogger Challenge Week 2

Ok, so, as I wait for my printer to work itself out so I can print my visa application (Canada work visa, very exciting), I figures I should actually sit down and write this out. A miniscule 2 hours before cut off time. Like usual, I leave things to the last minute. Especially when I have to be at work at 6am.

Anywho...

The challenge this week was to find something positive out of this 12wbt we've all been doing. We're always talking about how hard it is, or how much we hurt, or the food we don't like/don't want to eat etc. It's always got a slight negative tone to it, whether we mean it as that or not. And I'm just as guilty. Especially today when I only got a loss of 200g (more on this later).

So, the positives....

We were posed with the questions of what are we taking up.giving ourselves. Are we learning something new? Taking up a new sport? Giving ourselves a social life?

I have to answer in the negative about all of these things.

I'm not taking up a new sport. Other than the fact that most sports are played on a weekend and I'm a casual employee and therefore work on the weekends, I am leaving the country in a little over 3 months. So, there's no point in joining a sporting team, even if I had the weekends available.

I'm not giving myself a social life. Again, I work weekends. Either late nights or early mornings. SO, no going out on weekends. Also, my friends don't live in this town. I have 2 people I would consider friends in this town. And that kinda comes across as sad but it's not. I have many, many acquaintances in this town. I know alot of people. There's just too many I would choose to socialise with as friends etc. That's not to say I don't have friends. I do. Not a lot. But the ones I do have are amazing friends. The best. They just happen to live all over the world.

Learning something new? Maybe. There's no skill set I could say I'm learning. II don't have access to gym classes (much to my disappointment. I would love to regularly attend body pump, jam or combat classes), so my exercise is done outdoors, at the gym or at home. As I'm a PT, I'm finding that I'm just going through the motions a little with my exercise at the moment. What little I'm doing. I am learning new recipes. And I have always enjoyed cooking. So it's nice to have a few new, easy and tasty things to cook under my belt.

I think part of my lack of positive answers this week has to do with the fact that my motivation has wained this week. as of today I have lost 1kg. Just 1. And I know that I haven't been putting in a lot of consistency in my exercise but I have been eating really well. I have been changing recipes that I don't like for ones I do. I have been staying within my calories. I work on my feet for anything from 5-10 hours a day. Mum and I have been putting in at least 30-40 minutes walk a day. And I know that's not a lot.

I guess the positive is that I know I have to do more. I have to exercise. No excuses. Not even if my eyes are starting to droop on the 5 minute drive home. I cannot nap for 30 minutes and then go to the gym. I will go to the gym, tired or not; having worked 10 hours on my feet or not; having started work at 5am, or finishing at 10pm. I will go to the gym. I don't have a choice.

If I want to meet my goals of slimming down and needing to buy new clothes when I get to Vancouver, then I need to get over whatever is holding me back and just f*cking do it. Just get into the gym. Or outside.

So, I guess that's my positive. Next week I will be in the 70's, never to go back to the 80's. I have gotten over this all or nothing mentality. I need to ficus on the future, and Canada, and all the wonderful opportunities waiting for me over there.

I WILL DO IT!!!

Now I feel like I need to pull out my old psyc textbooks and read over them again. Do to myself what I do to my clients. Get them to look inside themselves. Get them to look at all the things they don't want to look at and have hidden away from for so long.

At least this has made me do that a little too.

I am a work in progress. I have to remember that the target will always move. That healthy living is just that, and not about being a certain size or number on the scale.

I can do this!